Musings (for the new year)

As the events of the past year wind down toward an end and the new year approaches, I have had an opportunity to reflect on my life and the lives of others; how we interact and relate and expectations that we have of each other and society in general. Winter has been difficult for me over the past 10-15 years, due to the seasonal affective tendencies that I have, so perhaps my musings are a little on the heavier side, but they are still a part of me. I am just going to ramble a bit.

In a nutshell, I think that life can be so hard when it comes to negotiating other peoples expectations. I think that most people, including myself, do the best that they can when it comes to doing the right thing and being a good person. We all have baggage, some more than others and it affects how we relate, adjust and behave. It seems that those with less baggage and cleaner, more adjusted lives have higher expectations due to their inexperience with difficulties and life's stumbling blocks. I think that I have had a fair amount of baggage, less than some and more than others; and I always try to look behind the 'supposed errors' that people make to give them the benefit of the doubt. I certainly don't always succeed. I am, after all, human. I think the difficulties in life sometimes give you a more balanced view of others and the fact that their behavior may result from their background and history.

It makes life difficult when people don't stop and take a minute to assess where another may be coming from. It makes life difficult when you know that your baggage may pass on to others, whether it be family or other people and put them into the unfortunate position of having to defend themselves against your baggage. It may be outright or very subtle, but it is hurtful to multiple people.

I heard a sermon once by a very wise pastor of ours. In fact, I swear this is true, his name was Pastor Wise. It has been years ago, so I really don't remember the entire thing, but one point has absolutely stuck with me for all of these years. The example was the classic tale of someone stealing from a grocery store, only to find out later that they were stealing because of no money and their children were hungry. The point which I try very hard to incorporate into my life is that in many situations, there is that one little bit of information that changes the whole situation. So often, we forget to consider that other little bit of information that changes everything.

None of us is perfect and I am far from it, but we all try to the extent that we can. I hope to continue to work on having understanding and compassion for others. Sometimes, it is easy to have it inside and harder to display it. That also is a goal of mine. I would also just urge others to look behind the action (or lack of action) that you consider wrong or out of order in an individual, to that little bit of information that may change the 'color' of the whole situation.

For the little things, I think it is important to put our little grievances to the "How important is it" test. Or from a well known author.. "Don't sweat the small stuff, and it's all small stuff"

If you have stayed with me this far, I commend you. This has been cathartic for me. Thanks for listening and I promise that I will now go back to my friendly, happy and fun posts. Have a wonderful new year!!

photo courtesy of Flickr